Full Brain & Early Morning

So it's super early in the morning and I have decided to take advantage of this disadvantage created by my body refusing to go back to sleep. I have a seven page paper due on Friday and for the most part I've just been brainstorming. What a more perfect time to start typing it now, in the early hours of the morning (by the way you'll NEVER find me up this early). Let me tell you the real reason why I'm awake so early.

My mind has been full, I mean crammed packed with "stuff". Besides the fact I feel myself getting this sickness that everyone seems to have at work, my brain is keeping me awake. The Lord has placed something in my life that I've been pondering a lot of the past month. One of those moments where I say "Am I really ready for this Lord?" Being a woman, I analyze everything over and over and over. My mind runs in circles thinking of every possible result of this particular situation.

I've been praying a lot about this particular situation. Telling the Lord that I don't want to make the wrong choice. That control factor is killing me, when it's completely out of my hands it drives me crazy. Even when I know that when the control is in the Lord's hands it's ALWAYS what's best. If things were in my control they would be a disaster. I know from scripture that His ways are best, He knows exactly what I need and when I need it.

So now I just wait. I've asked the Lord repeatedly for patience and peace in this time. There is nothing else for me to do but wait on the Lord to reveal His plan to me. That's not an easy thing to do. Thankfully I have other tasks to be completed and keep my mind off of this matter, but obviously sleeping is a bigger issue here. By the end of the day you'll probably find me passed out on my keyboard at about eight o'clock attempting to finish my seven page paper.